Man Thought Wife’s Facial Massager Was Sex Toy; Posts On Forum ‘Sharp Point Will Hurt Her’

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Image: China Press / (Olena Yakobchuk)

I‘m confused. Completely and thoroughly confused.

Firstly, why did I get assigned to write an article about a sex toy? *Aims death stares at my editor*

Secondly, what the hell is this contraption and who in the world would think that it was a device suitable for use in the bedroom?

Man Thought Wife’s Facial Massager Was Sex Toy

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Image: China Press

According to China Press, a man thought that this device was a sex toy.

Yes, this device. This seemingly innocent device that looks like it was made out of two tiny disco balls attached to a… I don’t even know what that is supposed to be.

A handle. Yes, that’s it.

Let’s examine it a little more shall we?

The ‘balls’ seem to have plenty of ridges, probably to induce a bit of friction for some extra stimulation. To massage the face of course, what were you thinking?

Not So Spoiler: It’s A Facial Massager

Since this is, in fact, a facial massager after all.

The elongated part is sleek and smooth. It’s pretty wide too for better grip, I presume. There’s even a black switch thing on the handle.

Is this thing supposed to turn on? No pun intended.

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Image: Tenor

For those who are still as confused as I am, a facial massager helps improve blood circulation to your face and neck area, which can lead to a better complexion.

Do you have a friend who has a fake life on Instagram? This would explain why they’re living the “Instagram Life”: (Also remember to follow us on Instagram!)

So no, it is not a sex toy and should not be used as one.

Man Found The Facial Massager & Posted It On Forum

Now you must be thinking why the **** would anyone think that this could be used in the private region.

It was reported that a man found the facial massaged at his wife’s side table. He was shocked upon seeing it and was worried that the sharp pointy bit at the end would injure his wife if she used it.

Concerned, he posted a picture of it onto a forum so he could get netizen’s opinions. He even made sure to ask if the item was dangerous. He also added that he tried to press the black button on the device.

Good thinking Sherlock.

But instead of netizens telling him that this ‘sex toy’ was in actuality a god damn facial massager, the internet decided to troll him.

One netizen replied saying:

“Oh, this one? it feels really nice when you use it on yourself though.”

While another said:

“I used it on my husband the other night. Super easy to use and can help to relax muscles.” 

Relax the muscles? Definitely, but probably not the ones you were thinking of.

Some allegedly even included a manual on how to use the roller.

*Facepalm* The internet strikes again.

Moral of the story? Don’t believe everything you read on the internet, and don’t ask it for answers either.

In the end, the wife saw him fiddling with her facial massager and asked him what he was doing with the device. It was then that he learnt the truth.

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